Stages ...

Written by Richard Sabbara

We are all familiar with the stages of Grief.... Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and then finally Acceptance. These stages apply to many things in life, for me, they are the most applicable when it comes to changing a poop filled diaper.
The first stage is denial. The child didn’t just poop, nah, we just changed him, it was gas, again. Phew, we really need to start watching what we feed the kid, maybe the wife farted and is trying to pass it off on the child acting like she didn’t do anything.
The second stage is Anger: Oh my God, what does this kid eat all day? Why does this happen only when I am around? I think the kid hates me. Whose turn is it, wait, it’s mine, that means that he is going to scream and roll around making a bigger mess. God, how much longer before we can potty train again?
The third state is Bargaining: “Sweetheart, your child pooped his pants again and the smell is getting really bad. I think this is a solid one so the clean up should not be too bad. Lets make a deal, you do this and I will give you a back rub later tonight, deal?”
The fourth state is Depression: This is a silent stage, usually mixed in with a little bit of anger as the walk to the changing area occurs. For me, this stage involves remembering when life was simpler and we didn’t have the child and anything else that might be remotely bothering me at that moment. All my issues culminate with this poop filled diaper. Depending on how easily the changing goes, depression and anger might end during the diaper change (usually after the child is wiped down and you are sure you will not be urinated on) or after when the child has finally stopped screaming.
The fifth and final state is acceptance, for me, this occurs at the earliest when I am washing my hands after the diaper change. However, if the diaper change has been a particularly bad one, then the anger/depression stage will last until the next poop hits the diaper and my wife begins the cycle.